Skip to main content

Recognition

I was leaving a hospital, after visiting someone, when I saw a man walking with his wife, their arms intertwined. She had a tired and tense expression in her eyes and helped him walk. Exhausted too, he walked. He was wearing blue hospital pijamas, the uniform of the near dead, of the kind no one wants to look at, since they remind us all that they can fit anyone.


I passed by and his eyes had an intense brightness. One that only those who had walked similar steps could understand. "Good afternoon! It's nice to go out, take a walk! Isn't it? He recognized me by looking into my eyes and smiled. "I've been here for thirty days. Last week they allowed me walk around the hospital for the first time. Today I took the chance and asked if I could do it outside. They let me!" He smiled again and took a quick look up to the open blue. 

 I felt a little tightness in my chest, mind and heart went back in time. Blue pijamas, unsure steps, one foot at a time, until the window, through which rays of Sun  shone in. The realization of the beauty of a blooming tree, the wet green grass after the months of draught in Brasilia, the blue sky, after uncountable intravenous accesses, catheters, vitals monitoring equipment, tests, darkness and death. The warmth of the Sun on your skin, the realisation of nature's life going on randomly and the hope to, one day, again, be a part of it.
"How wonderful!" I told him. "You know,  I've spent two months in a hospital. I know how it is to look at the sky like that!"
He smiled a large smile, his eyes smiling as well. I said that, but there was no need! I know he knew it already. He had recognized me!
"All the best!"
"Likewise!"

I turned around and resumed my walk. I felt my legs naturally striding, my body softly swaying,  the wind on my hair. Walking amidst that nature, that sky, all that I, once, looked from afar, with shadows of pain, eyes of enchantment and a small drop of hope. I felt his eyes following me, leaning on his wife, he observed me walking into the nature, into the red and blue shades of the sunset and he thought: "Who knows, maybe I too will... someday..."



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

I upset people (This may be the first of a series)

I feel I upset many people. Maybe it is something I do, but the feeling I get is that what upsets them is the way I live, the choices I make. People get upset with me when they hear I don't believe in God. If I tell them that I once did, but have lost my faith after I lost my first child, a premature baby, they fail to grasp the complexity of it. They look at me with irritating condescendent pityful eyes and they think I can be "fixed." To be fair, maybe I fail to help them understand that after what happened to me, God as I came to know it and most people of Christian beliefs do, is of no use to me.  God proved himself either nonexistent or useless to me when my first born died and when I almost followed him due to Eclampsia and Hellp Syndrome (Go ahead and google it! Unless you are doctor or had someone in the family who had this, you will never know it.) He did not save my baby and he did not spare me the excruciating suffering I had to endure. And if you think I...

Once

I once dated a werewolf            Eyes like flashlights           showing the path I once walked the path I found lost words I found lost pain I once threw my car from a bridge In the highest speed When street lights seemed like flying arrows and the water from the lake was a dark brick wall I once threw stones at the windows of the moon and sailed a boat of stardust in a lightless night I crossed the borders in disguise and spoke a million tongues I now decided to forget I once danced with a king on top of the highest tower No one ever saw the king No one, but me I once was a speck of dust I once was a grain of sand I was part of a hurricane And I landed on another land I once dreamt new dreams and wrote them on napkins I once wrote poems on spaceships and lies on  pages of ancient books no one ever read I once took a look I once took a pick I once took a bite It did not do the trick  ...

Chinese man

  She got up and went to get a cup of coffee. “Damned headache!” Acute and deep, precise, the day ruined. -        -   As if a long, fine, pointy needle forced itself through my cranium, you know? A Chinese man with long mustache holding one point of the needle, manipulating it, pushing it very slowly. -        -   Why Chinese? Seriously, she could not believe it! A headache from Hell, dripping sweat after the coffee and that was the question? -        -   Why not? Is there a law against the Chinese? -       I was just asking! -        -   It’s my pain, isn’t it? If it’s Chinese, Japanese, Arabic, what is the difference? -        -   Forget it!    She regretted the rude reply, but did not apologize! Apologizing would require time, explanations, facing the Chinese man, pulling him by the mustache, immobilizin...