Gentileza em tempos de selvageria

Plantar gentileza em tempos de selvageria

Escolher o sim ou o não

Perceber que o verde das folhas não é um único verde

Cada uma em suas nuances, suas finas curvas e linhas

Como rugas que caminham em nossas faces

Cada tom, bandeira, água, amarelado

Como os envelopes de cartas de um primeiro amor

Eterno em devaneios

Leve em bolhas de sabão

E o não saber o que é reto, o que é correto e certo

se não o íntegro de si

que é nada além da matéria do sonho

e o concreto do desejo

e do sexo.

Essa busca pelo que é lá no fundo de si

Que salta daqui para ali

Que não sabe mais ser contido em um continente

oco que um dia coube o mundo

Hoje vazio e entupido

Como se pudesse ser tudo ao mesmo tempo que vácuo

O ontem e o amanhã

no mesmo barco

porque não se sabe o que é um ou o outro

E toda essa história de sim e de não é tão balela

quanto essa ideia de gentileza em tempo de selvageria

Suportaria talvez um dia?

Duraria quem sabe o sopro de uma vela

esse amor eterno em fantasia

Comments

I upset people (This may be the first of a series)

I feel I upset many people. Maybe it is something I do, but the feeling I get is that what upsets them is the way I live, the choices I make. People get upset with me when they hear I don't believe in God. If I tell them that I once did, but have lost my faith after I lost my first child, a premature baby, they fail to grasp the complexity of it. They look at me with irritating condescendent pityful eyes and they think I can be "fixed." To be fair, maybe I fail to help them understand that after what happened to me, God as I came to know it and most people of Christian beliefs do, is of no use to me. God proved himself either nonexistent or useless to me when my first born died and when I almost followed him due to Eclampsia and Hellp Syndrome (Go ahead and google it! Unless you are doctor or had someone in the family who had this, you will never know it.) He did not save my baby and he did not spare me the excruciating suffering I had to endure. And if you think I...

Once

I once dated a werewolf Eyes like flashlights showing the path I once walked the path I found lost words I found lost pain I once threw my car from a bridge In the highest speed When street lights seemed like flying arrows and the water from the lake was a dark brick wall I once threw stones at the windows of the moon and sailed a boat of stardust in a lightless night I crossed the borders in disguise and spoke a million tongues I now decided to forget I once danced with a king on top of the highest tower No one ever saw the king No one, but me I once was a speck of dust I once was a grain of sand I was part of a hurricane And I landed on another land I once dreamt new dreams and wrote them on napkins I once wrote poems on spaceships and lies on pages of ancient books no one ever read I once took a look I once took a pick I once took a bite It did not do the trick ...

The child that did not stay

I remember expecting a child that never came, a child I never held in my arms. I remember expecting a child who would have his father's hair, his kind eyes. He would be curious of the world and I would follow closely all the things he would see with enchanted eyes. Everything would be new for his new eyes. Those were the words of a song about someone else's child, a song I used to listen to while waiting for this child. I remember dreaming of his future, of his smiles. I remember my hopes for him. He did not want me, this child. He did not stay. He was not interested in the playground in front of the building we live. He was not interested in having my hand holding his while he walked his first steps. He did not care about the flowers, leaves, little dry sticks that fall from the trees in our neighbourhood. He did not want to listen to the slightly out of tune lullabies I was going to sing or the stories I would read at bedtime. He did not even care for the milk, all th...

Inner Babel / Babel Interior

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